Continental drift

So I’ve been here almost two weeks, I think the world is due is a brief sample of my musings.


Day1

Arrive in Mumbai to a sultry 32 degree welcome. It is the Dassera Holiday today so the place isn’t as hectic as one might imagine and fortunately the smell isn’t anywhere near what I had been led to believe it would be. I thank the cooling breeze blowing in off the Arabian Sea and jump into our car which has successfully honked its way across a line of traffic . The journey is both noisy and eventful with a relentless cacophony of car, bike and autorickshaw horns accompanied by unusual visual stimulation such as urbanite bovine and fowl, an orange haired guru-like mystic and the strange and slightly disturbing sight of two young boys appearing from an open manhole.

Spend the afternoon exploring Juhu where we stop for a beach front Coke which sets us back about 25p inclusive of straw.

Times of India:

“Cops barged into a Juhu pub on Sunday night and picked up 240 youngsters on suspicion of “doing drugs”. Policemen had earlier visited the pub on Thursday but failed to arrest any of the alleged peddlars.”

“100’s gathered at a roadside Cross of Jesus Christ in Chakale Road on Thursday evening when water was seen seeping from its toes. Several devotees filled water bottles…. The statue is centuries old but has been recently renovated and is made of fibreglass”



Day 2

2 Cows, 0 chickens, numerous stray dogs, 1 x goat, 1 x naked guru, 3x hawkers selling giant balloons.

Visited the historic centre of South Mumbai, swiftly left the Gateway of India as it was under renovation and largely wrapped so you couldn’t see it. The sun was baking as it reflected off the light coloured floor surface so we dashed off to a local Parsi Café where I sampled my first mango lassi.

My intro to Indian cricket as the 1st test vs Australia begins with the Ausies amassing a decent 400 odd total.

Slowly, the language of incessant use of car horns is beginning to reveal itself….



Day 3

6x cows, so many stray dogs they don’t bear mentioning, 1x pot belied guru, 1 hawker selling maps, street kids begging and tapping at our car window.

Those car horns are nothing but background noise now. Even the art of crossing the road seems simpler than at first glance. I think you basically step out into oncoming traffic and force them to stop. Extending your nearside hand towards their bonnets whilst nonchalantly looking away seems to be the technique of choice.

We are already gearing up for the next holiday in a few weeks time.

Diwali is a big one. The Indian Christmas I have geared it described as.

Well, in so far as it is the “festival of lights” it does kind of match Sandfields, Port Talbot for a brazen display of seasonal illumination except the lights are rather more tasteful and the displays lack the ubiquitous Santa/Rudolph combination so beloved of those council house rooftops. I can but hope it remains so.

Day 4

0x cows, 4x goats, 1x donkey

Not just the sound of vehicles, but the sight also has become the norm. Most vehicles in this city are for hire and are consequently coloured a two-tone black and yellow to help distinguish them from all those other two tone black and yellow vehicles that swarm like so many wasps around the arterial roads and gullies of the city.

We visit South Mumbai again and watch some spontaneous cricket matches played upon Oval Maiden. The backdrop is of a gothic picture postcard Victoriana and simply screams ‘Empire”. I notice the streets are much quieter and free of autorickshaws. Our driver explains they are banned from entering this far into the heart of the historic city centre and that they are limited to a point on one of the entrance causeways. Mumbai was once a series of Islands and much of the modern day city centre and adjacent areas have been reclaimed from the sea. The city is now scarred with creeks that act as nothing less than open sewers. These effluent highways snake their way across the urban landscape caring not whether an area is rich or poor, though it is often found that the poorest of society will be “housed” along their banks, vulnerable to both seasonal flooding and malarial risk.

Day 5

The first day of work.

Our office is located somewhere amidst a labyrinth of gullies, somewhere behind the Grand Hyatt hotel, hidden upon a sprawling hinterland of a business park. When I say business park, I don’t refer to the manicured lawns and columned entrances of such parks in the western world, no, this is more like the small unkempt industrial estates one might find in working class towns where pavements are optional, fly tipping is to be expected and deeply rutted roads are standard.

Upon entry to our workplace it reveals itself as a bit of a throw back to the 70’s, which though it was expected, it still comes as a great relief to hear we are moving into new premises over the next few weeks.

Hallelujah! There is aircon.

The CEO draws us a map of Mumbai, and against all my understood conventions, North and South, East and West are flipped to a mirror image of what we in the West would call the norm.

I guess it is all a matter of perception and there are no wrongs and rights, but hell, it would be a damned sight easier for me if everyone stuck to the rules.

But that I guess is the essence of India in so far as I have thus far understood. Rules are there merely as guidelines, not necessarily as objects of control to always be obeyed.

If you happen to be driving on the “wrong” side of the road, it is only ones perception of what is wrong that makes it so.

Perhaps it is our rigid Western way of thinking that needs to be examined? Already I am aware of so many dichotomies in this country, though I am sure I have only just scratched the surface.

The city is constantly busy, 24/7, yet nobody is in a rush. There is an inordinate volume of vehicles on the road, each following their own rules and with no apparent system of priority, yet the traffic somehow keeps flowing.

There is great poverty and great wealth in close proximity yet still I am oblivious to any latent animosity between societies haves and have nots.

India is going to take a lot of understanding, and I am excited about what experiences lie in wait.